


haunted

by aestheticrobin



Category: Artemis: Requiem (Comics), DCU (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Angst and Tragedy, Comfort/Angst, Depression, Emotional Hurt, F/M, References to Depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-23
Updated: 2020-03-23
Packaged: 2021-02-23 05:00:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23272672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aestheticrobin/pseuds/aestheticrobin
Summary: " we used to be so warmbut now we're just an ice storm "- in which artemis is having a hard time handling rejection after being replaced by someone else
Relationships: Artemis of Bana-Mighdall/Jason Todd
Comments: 8
Kudos: 9





	haunted

**Author's Note:**

> heeey! i'm finally back ,, haven't posted since christmas, but that doesn't mean i haven't been writing. since we're all in quarantine, that means i have a lot of time to finish all of my works, so expect a lot of them soon
> 
> also ,, my birthday was yesterday (21st) and i decided i wanted to post something to "celebrate" it, but i couldn't finish it on time, so it's 3a.m. and i just finished writing this one since it was the one with the most written already
> 
> and because i love angst, here it is ,, sorry if it isn't really good, i personally think it isn't, but oh well! i tried my best, so enjoy it, i guess
> 
> p.s. - the general idea of this was inspired by listening to the song "haunted", by melanie martinez ,,

That was the last place on Earth Artemis would want to be in that night. Or in any other time, in that matter.

She knew Diana was looking through the corner of her eye, watching the redhead as she silently drowned her sorrows by the bar, with a pity look in her orbs. Good for her, maybe the sight would make her regret dragging Artemis to that gala against the woman's will.

Artemis drank, in hopes it would ease the pain and numb everything she felt, as she watched the newly engaged couple, the sensation of the moment, plastered in every magazine cover. Oh, how she was glad that they hadn't noticed her... yet.

She watched from afar, the petite blonde woman taking the place that once was hers beside the man she loves, happily flashing a sparkly ring around her finger. In four years, Artemis hadn't achieved what the blonde did in a little over a year. She really wasn't enough for anyone...

She stared at his arm wrapped around the woman's hips, at the way he stared at her like she was the only woman in the whole world, at how they smiled at each other before kissing, and a lone tear made its way down the redhead's face. Artemis didn't even bother wiping it away, she just kept chugging on her drink as she remembered the times when she was still his.

"Hey, Artemis..." a hand was softly placed over the woman's shoulder unexpectedly, but she didn't even flinch. "I think maybe you should stop drinking"

"I am fine, Diana" she shrugged it off, her eyes still stuck in the action unfolding in front of her. "I don't need anyone to check on me, specially since I never wanted to be here"

"Goddesses, Artemis..." Diana sighed, before taking a deep breath. "I'm sorry Artemis, I really am. I just wanted to get you out of the house, I had no idea he would bring her, neither that they were engaged"

"I have told you already Diana, I am fine by myself" the bitterness in her voice was noticeable now. "I don't need you or anyone. Stop worrying"

"Artemis, I don't want to have this conversation with you again" she warned. "Specially here"

"Then go away!" she blurted, finally turning to look at Diana, and spinning back around on her stool as she saw someone approaching. "Bruce Wayne is coming, probably wants to talk to you"

"Artemis..." the worry in her voice was noticeable.

"I'm fine" she cut her off. "Please, go. Don't let me ruin the night for you"

Diana sighed, opening her mouth to keep talking, but decided against it. It certainly wasn't neither the time nor place to deal with this. Turning around to greet Bruce, who came to talk to her, Diana couldn't help but notice the quick look he took towards Artemis, and she sure could feel it burning on her back. Ah yes, Bruce Wayne, Artemis' biggest fan!

"Bruce" she greeted the man with a polite smile, as he reached out to place a kiss on the back of Diana's hand. "How unexpected to find you here. I didn't know any of you were coming tonight"

"I guess I could say the same" his eyes quickly darted towards the redhead once again, with a certain distaste. "I believe we have much to discuss"

"Yes, you're right" she flashed him a quick smile, before grabbing his arm and spinning him around to make their way out of there. "But I believe it's best if we chat somewhere else, don't you agree?"

"A great idea" he let Diana guide him away from the place they stood before, as she knew Bruce wasn't much of a fan of the redhead, and right now, Diana didn't want to contribute to her fragile mental state.

Deciding that would be the last drink of the night - as the alcohol did on her the same water would do: nothing -, Artemis took the last sip from her glass and stood up from her place at the bar, only to realize how lost she was. No one to talk to, no one she knew, and a couple she wanted to avoid at all costs. The only option left for her was to make her way to a corner in the back of the room and hope no one bothered her for the rest of the night. Maybe she could even find a balcony on some empty room where she could catch some fresh air later.

Trying to make herself as small and unnoticeable as she could, Artemis squeezed herself through the crowd present in that room, trying her best to go unnoticed, until the Goddesses decided all of it wasn't enough yet and made someone bump against her, almost knocking her down - damn, Artemis, can't you hold yourself up anymore?! You can handle those drinks!

The thing was: not just someone.

Him.

Jason Todd.

Artemis and Jason were madly in love - or at least, he made her believe he was as well. The four years they had spent togheter had been the best years in the redhead's whole life, until they weren't. As she sets on her mind that he's the one, Jason pulls the rug.

It all happened one day, when she got home and Jason wasn't there, and neither were any of his belongings, only a handwritten note placed over the table: "I can't do this anymore. I'm sorry". Just like that, with no explanation. Artemis desperately tried to contact him, but he wouldn't answer. And just like that, that day turned to be the worst day of her life.

Artemis immediately packed her things and, without telling anyone - like if there was anyone who bothered about her -, left on her way to Europe. Finding herself alone, once again in her life, Artemis cried a lot, and with her solitude, she tried to find answers within herself for what happened. And her conclusion was that she was never enough. Never worth anything. Losing her mother, then Akila... she managed to handle it, pushing all of those feelings deep inside her and keep acting like it wasn't eating her inside. But everyone has a breaking point, and she had finally reached it.

The pressure was always too much. Jason was all Artemis had, and still he got tired and abandoned her, without any explanation about it. She imagined how glad Bruce would be when he got the news they were no longer togheter - maybe this had all been his fault! -, since he never really liked Artemis. She never knew for what reason, she only knew the billionaire wasn't very fond of her, and she could still hear him threatening her not to break his son's heart. Turns out it happened the other way around... but no one cared, anyway.

Artemis settled in London, without much thought - she just wanted to get away from Gotham -, and with all of her sadness and solitude, her breaking point brought her a major depression. Barely eating, barely sleeping, always her and those four walls, physically silent but loud enough in her mind. Artemis was weak and sick. She was no longer the fierce woman people once knew. She was now a nobody.

It wasn't until a bit over three months later that Artemis ended up in the hospital, bleeding, receiving shocking news: she had had a miscarriage. She was pregnant, and didn't even notice it. Of course, the shock only added to the decay of her mental health, and after almost a year, Diana decided to search up on her cousin to check on her. Discovering in what such of a state Artemis was, she rushed to take her back to Gotham and help her recover from all she had suffered the past year.

It took a few months for Diana to know what had happened between Jason and Artemis, and when she did, she thought the woman just needed some time for herself and that she was doing fine. Her fierce personality didn't lie. Besides, Diana and Artemis weren't really much friends, so she just decided to let the woman have a moment for herself. That was all she ever needed, anyways. Until it wasn't.

When she finally decided to check up on her and found the broken redhead in that tiny old apartment, Diana felt such guilt inside her that she decided she had to help Artemis getting through it. The redhead had no one else to count on, and besides that, Diana couldn't help but feel like it was her fault for not checking up on Artemis and thinking her independent self was - once again - doing just fine. Her fault for forgetting she was only human.

However, it wasn't easy at all, and even after a few months, Diana still has no idea of any of her thoughts, or even that she lost a baby she didn't know existed inside her. All she knew was that Jason left her, with no explanation, and that the redhead still kept everything locked up inside her, always silent, just like she locked herself up inside Diana's house. And that was the reason that made Diana bring Artemis out for the night - even though it accidentally brought up a situation that Artemis wasn't sure she was able to deal with, now or at any other time.

"Jason" it was involuntary, the weak voice instinctively made its way out of her mouth. "You look great tonight"

"Artemis. It's been a while" she could notice the way his eyes observed her, noticing something was wrong with her, as he was as well surprised to find the redhead there. "How are you?"

"I'm... doing okay" Artemis replied, trying her best to control her anxiety. "And you?"

"Better that ever" the smile on his face as he happily stared at the blonde by his side and threw his arm around her waist stung in her heart, along with his words, like someone had shot an arrow through her chest right there. "I believe you haven't met my fiancee, Isabel"

"It's nice to meet you" the blonde said with a sickly sweet smile on her face, holding her hand out to greet Artemis.

"Likewise" she replied, taking her hand away from the other woman's when she felt the sting of her engagement ring.

Jason's eyes moved back to look at Artemis, looking at her like he felt something, like he noticed something wasn't right. It certainly wasn't. Nothing was right. He noticed that, but that wasn't the place to discuss anything - as much as his heart told him to. Jason definitely didn't expect the biggest mistake of his whole life to backfire on him, bringing back his one and only true love in a broken form, right when he was "settling" down.

"Congratulations on your engagement" she tried her best to hide the disappointment in her tone. "You two make a really nice couple, I wish you two all the best. Now, if you excuse me, I have to go. Have the rest of a good night"

Before anyone could even tell her anything back, Artemis rushed out of that crowd, feeling the air being pulled out of her lungs. Was that ring ever meant to be hers? How could Jason move on so fast? Was he cheating on her? Was he looking at her with pity of who she had become, of how weak she was? That no one would care for the mess Artemis was?

Why did Jason leave like that?!

Her mind was racing, exploding with unanswered questions as she felt the world close in on her. Noticeably in panic, Artemis rushed up the stairs, stumbling as it was getting impossible to breathe, and walked inside the bathroom, closing the door behind her as her knees gave out on her body and a panic attack took over her. Tears streamed down her face as she struggled to breathe air in. If Artemis was in her right state of mind in that moment, she would punch herself for crying over a man.

But it was more than just crying, and over more than a man.

"Artemis!" she heard someone shout her name and a hand resting over her shoulder, the figure kneeling down next to her and a long forgotten warmth rubbing all over her back.

"Come on, breathe... Just calm down" Jason said, gently, taking a hold of her hand and helping her ease her breathing. "Breathe in... Now out... Yes, that's it. Keep breathing. In, then out"

Taking their time, Artemis finally calmed down and went back to breathing regularly. Jason was still holding the woman's hand, his gaze on her as she faced the nothing. That was when Jason could see the damage he had caused his greatest love for running away to get a stable and socially acceptable life, pressured by the high class society, and indirectly, by his father.

Her hair didn't shine anymore, and neither did her eyes, now void of any other emotion that wasn't pain or sadness. Her silk smooth skin was now paler, and it made him notice he did remember that white dress from somewhere: their last anniversary date. However, it fit her no way that it did before. Artemis had lost a lot of weight, and he could notice by how loose that garment now fitted, the once curvy body he trailed with his hands now with bones poking out.

She was depressed. Artemis Grace was broken, and it was all his fault.

"Artemis..." he called out, but her low voice interrupted him, before he could say anything else.

"Why?" was all she asked, still not daring to look at the man.

Jason took a deep breath. He knew he owed her an explanation, Jason knew he had messed up big time. This was the least he could do.

"I-..." how was he supposed to explain her that he left for such a coward reason?! "Please, Artemis, I'm really sorry, I shouldn't have left you, I-..."

"Just tell me why" her voice was louder now, and Jason could see her eyes on him, but now they were filled with anger.

"Because I was stupid, okay?!" he blurted out. "Because this stupid society took me at my weakest point and was able to manipulate me into having this "perfect life" they want. Because I was fucking stupid. Because I let my issues take over me and in result, they could easily manipulate me!"

"God, Artemis, I'm really sorry..." a tear ran down his face as he spoke. "I know this is such a sloppy and stupid reason, but sadly, that is the truth. And while I wish I could say it was something else, I know you understand. I know it's not an excuse, but only you knew how mentally unstable I was, and unfortunately, I let myself listen to others instead of listening to you. I'm really sorry, Red..."

"No, you do not get to call me that anymore! You don't!" she blurted out, obviously angry at the man, but the anger quickly dissipated from her face and was instead replaced with pure sadness. "I'm sorry, I... You're right. I do understand. I am never good enough, and that's okay"

Tears felt like they were threatening to fall, but she had already cried so much that her eyes were empty, dried out of tears. 

"Artemis, that's not true" Jason tried to assure her. "None of this was your fault!"

"Yes, it was... I wasn't good enough for them, so consequently, I wasn't good enough for you" she spoke, bringing her hands up to her loose hair and grabbing fistfuls of it, pulling them. "I was a shame, an embarrassment. I wasted four years of your life, Jason! I am a failure! Get away from me! Just go!"

"No, Artemis! Don't!" he realized the woman was about to have another panic attack and immediately placed himself in front of her, holding her boney wrists to prevent her from pulling any more hair. "I'm not going anywhere! Please, just calm down! C'mon, breathe... In and out, just like you told me..."

Fear struck Jason as he saw the deplorable state she fell in. Never would anyone imagine - specially him - that the mind of such a fierce and strong woman like her would get hurt to this point. Specially when it was all his fault, for being so stupid.

"I'm so stupid..." she mumbled in between her sobs, and Jason couldn't take it anymore, bringing her against him for a hug.

That was when Jason felt how tiny she was. Her weight was definitely unhealthy. His heart was shattered, broken into a million pieces, and he was sure she had lost almost half of her weight.

"No, you're not, Artemis" Jason couldn't help but let his tears silently roll down his face as well, while he caressed her skinny back. "You're the best woman I have ever met"

"No, I'm not" her weak voice mumbled against his now wet tuxedo. "I killed him... Or her"

"What are you talking about?" Jason certainly wasn't understanding anything.

"I killed it" she mumbled, a bit louder this time. "I killed our baby"

"Our... baby?" that shocked him. "You were pregnant?"

And little did they know, a worried Diana who had just reached the door of the bathroom, searching for her cousin, had just heard the redhead's statement. Needless to say, she was shocked. Never had Diana imagined that could have happened to her, that she had such a thing bottled inside her.

"I lost it... I'm really sorry" Artemis broke down crying once again. "I had no idea. I'm so, so sorry, Jason"

"Don't apologise for something that isn't your fault, Artemis" he pulled her away from his shoulder, moving his hands to her wet face and wiping away her tears.

"Artemis?" called Diana as she knocked on the door and opened it slightly, deciding it was time to intervene. "Oh Goddesses! What happened?"

Diana was quick to kneel beside her, holding Artemis' hands in hers, and noticing Jason wiping away his tears with his sleeves in the corner of her eye, discreetly. She knew her question was in vain, because by what she saw and the little bit she heard, Diana already knew.

"Nothing" Artemis sniffled, aggressively wiping the rest of her tears away and getting up from the cold floor, walking away from the two of them towards the bassinet. "I'm fine now. It's alright. You two can go back downstairs"

"Artemis-..." Jason said as he got up from the ground too, as well as Diana, but was quickly cut off by the unstable redhead.

"What are you even doing in here still?" she blurted, now looking at him. "You have a fiancee downstairs, probably looking for you, you don't need to be here listening to this crap"

"You just told me you were pregnant with our child and had a miscarriage, and you want me to act like it was nothing?" Jason blurted. "You want me to act like you're really okay, when you're obviously not?! Damn it, Artemis! Just look at yourself! You lost almost half of your weight, and in these fifteen minutes of breakdown, your emotions were all over the place!"

"He is right, Artemis" Diana spoke, gently. "You're not okay. You've been through so much, you need help. Let us help you"

"I don't need help! I have told you already, I'm fine! Don't you all have breakdowns sometimes?!" shouted Artemis. "I just need to be left alone"

"Leaving you alone only causes damages, Artemis" responded Diana. "And you know it"

"Princess" something in Artemis shifted when she heard Jason's voice calling her that. "Just because I left you for a very stupid reason, it doesn't mean I don't love you. In fact, I realized I love you more each day. But I'm a complete idiot. An asshole. And even if I didn't mean it, I did this to you. And I'm really, really sorry"

"You were all I had, Jason..." her voice was weak. "And yet, I never stopped loving you"

Letting her back clash against the cold wall of the bathroom, Artemis sighed as her eyes closed shut, one single tear rolling down her face.

"How are you, Artemis?" asked Diana.

"I am so tired..." her voice sounded low, as the last strand of little energy she had in her quickly worn out.

"Come on, let's take you home" said the older woman, approaching Artemis to help her compose herself. "I'm sorry I brought you here, I should have listened to you"

"It's alright" replied Artemis. "I'm sorry for ruining your night..."

"Don't worry about that" Diana gave her a soft smile, as her hands gently brushed her hair in place, and Jason could only wish it was him doing that, and definitely in better circumstances.

Darting her eyes to Jason brought Artemis to do the same, encouraging the two of them to share their last words before the two women left for the night.

"Can we just have a minute?" asked the redhead to her cousin, unable to break the mutual gaze with the man.

"I'll be outside" nodded Diana, before placing a kiss on Artemis' forehead and walking out of the room, leaving the ex-couple alone, once again.

Slowly approaching her, Jason stuffed his hands in his pockets, not knowing if he should be the first to speak or not. But eventually, after a few seconds of finally admiring each other's eyes after so long, he decided to take the first step.

"So... we were going to be parents, huh?" Jason spoke, nervously bitting his lower lip. "What a wild ride it would be... Could you imagine?"

"Sincerely? Yes" Jason could swear he saw a slight curve on her lips. "Even if it was never in our plans"

"I would like to make it a plan, someday in the future" he moved his hand up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. "With you"

Before he could drop his hand back to his side, Artemis reached out to grab it, locking her eyes with his once again. It had been so long since any of them had felt anything that intense, and in the heat of the moment, they couldn't help but crash their lips togheter in a gentle, soft and passionate kiss. No longer caring about anyone or anything for a moment. Only them, just like in the old days.

As they broke from their kiss, Jason rested his forehead against hers, brushing his thumb gently over her cheek.

"I hope someday you can forgive me, and we can try again" Jason was the first to speak, breaking the comfortable silence that had fell between them. "Until then, I want you to focus on healing yourself. Not for me, not for anyone, but for you. Because I know you're a strong woman, and you still have a lot to live, even if not by my side"

"I hope someday I can forgive you too, Jason. And I hope we can try again" she replied, bringing her hand up to finally feel his face, after so long. "While it doesn't happen, I wish you all the best in your new life with Isabel. Because, like you said, I do understand, and I don't exactly blame you for what happened, but it's still hard. And she seems like a nice woman, so I hope you treat her right while she gives you everything I couldn't give to you"

"No one will ever give me more than you did, Artemis, no matter how hard they try" he opened her hand, placing something in her palm and closing it. "This is yours. It has always been yours, even if I never had the chance to give it to you. I want you to keep it, in hopes that someday, I will get down on my knee for you"

In her hand was the most beautiful ring she had ever seen. The ring was shaped like a crown, and Artemis knew exactly the meaning behind it.

"I love you, princess" he said, a gentle but sad smile present on his lips. "I always will"

"I love you too, little one" she replied, mimicking his facial expression. "I always have"

And with one last meaningful look, Artemis walked out of that bathroom, leaving the building with Diana, with her hand closed shut safely around the ring, and a tiny bit of hope built inside her.

Maybe she felt like this could be the start of her new beginning. Maybe, from the million of shattered pieces she had broken into, he had managed to glue two of them back togheter.

And that was all it took to begin.

**Author's Note:**

> let me know what you think ,,


End file.
